Peg Meets Another Mother …

As we roll into Mother’s Day weekend, TC shares with Peg his thoughts on “another mother.” Read on! —the editor

Dearest Peg,

As we approach another Mother’s Day, I have neglected to understand the fact that technically, you do not have a mother, unless you recognize our Prosthetic expert
David, is like both the mother and father for my new left leg.

It is no surprise that my parents have passed away. When we hit Mother’s and Father’s Day, we get a sense of melancholy. However I still have a special woman who is still alive that has had an important part of my life, and has been a family member for over 50 years.

Her name is Ellen O’Leary Vogel. She is what is the definition of what Mom would call an “another mother”. She is actually the sister my mother never had, and I am lucky to have her as my Godmother.

She is what is the definition of what Mom would call an “another mother”…

Ellen entered my family’s life before I was born. A student at Framingham State College, Ellen became an assistant to my mom and our increasingly expanding family. Even when we moved to New Jersey before my birth, She came to visit annually, including to attend my baptism. She is a bonus relative that we looked forward to when she showed up. Her Boston accent was to us unique, and we often thought she was our family equivalent to Penny Marshall, not like her character Laverne De Fasio, on Laverne and Shirley.

Ellen had gotten married to Joe Vogel, the fireman, who was, other that Monsignor Puma at St Vincent’s Church, The only man who could lift me up over his head and
throw me around during a family reunion.

That couple brought us Lauren, Ellen’s daughter, who I watched grow up, even more so since I went to college in Boston for a year, and the Vogel house was a local place to do laundry and hang with familiar faces.

Ellen invited me to visit Boston for the first time in 1981 after graduating from grade school. She took me to my first Boston Pops concert on VFW night, followed by my first cookies and cream ice cream from Brighams’ AND my first visit to THE Filene’s Basement.

My love affair with the city of Boston continued for many years, yet when circumstances had changed, and Boston was not in the cards for my future, visiting Boston for work or pleasure always involved a visit to Ellen and Lauren. When I couldn’t get there, they came to Jersey, every year (even twice a year!).

We were able to get them out here in Vegas for my parent’s 50th Wedding Anniversary, which was extra special, since it has been the last time we got the family together.

I last visited Ellen in 2021, just has things started to re-open after the pandemic. This was an important New England swing I needed to do after Mom passed away in 2019, also postponed by the pandemic. It was a great visit and I enjoyed the time we spent visiting them and my cousins in Swansea, Mass.

I think it was divine intervention to make that trip at that time, since shortly after my Agnes/Peg adventures started…

Ellen is getting on in age and not as mobile as she used to be. Brother Paul has jumped in to be the touchstone between families. Paul, Ellen and Lauren have incredible
chemistry together. Maybe it is because of the legendary story that Paul was dropped on his head while Ellen was changing his diaper. I think that too was divine intervention, as I witnessed the care Paul supported Lauren to get her through a surgery Ellen was having and some complications. I could only strive for that kind of talent.

So Peg, the moral of this tale is that you need to search out for the other mothers in our lives. We were lucky. Between Ellen and in Madison, Mrs. Leary, Mom had the (knack) talent to search out for people with heart.

These “other mothers” get us through the tough times and celebrate through the good times.

Your other mothers could be our roomies, Mr Jay, and even David. As said during my eulogy of my mother, back in 2019, there is a little bit of Mama Bear in all of us. In a way, you are a mother to me, protecting me from falling down. That is what being a mother is all about.